Nerdy, Shy and Socially Inappropriate by Cynthia Kim

The subtitle for this book is “A User Guide to an Asperger Life” and that pretty much sums it up. It is also a memoir in that the author illustrates the points she is making with anecdotes from her own life.

Because the target audience for this books seems to be, for the main part, other autistics, like me, rather than just those trying to understand them, I found it so much more useful than the self-help type books aimed more at NT parents. Especially as Cynthia was only diagnosed at age 42, and I’m now 41 myself. There is so much useful information here on things like managing sensory issues, on how aging might effect us, on how to manage relationships including marriage.

Again, like all the books I’m reading, I see so much of myself in these pages, even though a lot of situations are different too. For example, I share a love of karate with the author and she has helped me understand even better why it suited me so much as a sport. On the other hand, her daughter is not autistic and so I can read about what that’s like even though I don’t experience it myself.

It would have been easy for me to think that I had nothing new to learn from this book. I already know an awful lot about autism, right? But certain sections, such as the parts about empathy, blew me away. And the section on Executive Function, including the tips on how to cope when it dysfunctions, is one I imagine I will be going back to several times.

This is a truly useful book if you are autistic and looking for a bit of extra help and understanding in your daily life.


  1. Reblogged this on Mamautistic and commented:
    Great review of Nerdy, Shy, and Socially Inappropriate by Cynthia Kim.

    Counterpart found this to be the most helpful book for trying to understand me better ❤ So I wholeheartedly recommend it for allistic (non-autistic) spouses, partners, friends, etc.

    I loved it myself too!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This book was recommended to me by a friend when I was at the beginning of my journey to discontinued I was autistic a few years back, and I loved it – I still remember how full of “aha!” moments it was… 🙂


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